Considering failure as normal
Failures may become a serious handicap to you when you refuse to consider them as normal part of life. This is because we are living in an increasingly competitive world. Ever raising standards of living have extended the domain of this competition far and wide. We have no choice but to compete for everything in life. In this competition, at times we succeed and many times we fail. Now, learning to handle these failures is essential and critical for a happy and successful life.
Wrong Ways of Handling Failure
Handling failure becomes a problem when we tend to cling to the sorry state of the outcome we face at that point in time. Sometimes, we tend to do this to elicit sympathy for the condition we are in. This make us falsely believe that it will absolve us from all the negative and undesired result of our failures.
Incidentally, people also use failures to evoke sympathy from others. Gaining sympathy means attracting attention. People love to gain attention. The real problem starts when they try to stretch this sympathy gaining program too long. This will not only retain the negativity of the incident in the person but also increase his tendency to replicate this pattern in every other failures. This may also build up a psyche which will look at failures as an attractive option.
Failure can be very dis-empowering. It may keep a person in the dark for long unless decisive action is taken to overcome this state. The most basic thing a person in such a phase need is a worthy cause – or some action which uplifts his spirits. This will enable him to come out of the inactive state he gets into facing a failure. The better the cause or course of action, the easier it will be for him to pull out of the pit.
Besides, getting into a proactive mode to handle failure – another solution is to alter the way you look at things in life. When you fail, you tend to direct your focus more at the empty portion of the glass. When you are down it is more than likely you get attracted to the negatives. You should change this approach. Learn to shift your focus to the filled up portion of your glass.
Remember, even in failures there are many things you learn new. There may be things which are likely to help you avoid similar failures in future. These are things lying in the half full or the quarter filled glass in your hand. Focus on them and be grateful for gaining important lessons from them. The point is to learn the positive points from those things – even if they are limited – that helped you some way or the other in your actions that caused the failure. Basically, change your perspective and get moving in life.
One more sure shot way to overcome failure is to generally look at life in a positive manner and count on things for which you are grateful for. These things may be totally unrelated to the process in which you failed – but they always help us align our perspective in the right direction. When we look at all the positive things we possess, they truly help us enjoy our life. In simple terms it is called ‘gratitude’ to life. This is a simple emotion that can keep us healthy and filled up with positive thoughts and provide us strength to come out of every dire situation we face in our lives.